Life is a series of questions
That range from the banal to the most profound. And, if you're not curious enough, you'll struggle with it a lot. For example, how do you make friends? Be curious about the other person. Ask them what they like. But, what if they don't like me? I guess, you'll just have to find out. What if I get hurt? Then you'll have to figure out how to take care of yourself.
Sure, this sounds simple. I just notice that a lot of people who are under my care struggle because they have beliefs that they don't even challenge. Those beliefs may have served them very well in the past but, maybe, it doesn't work now. And, instead of parsing the situation to identify where their beliefs clash with reality, they just want to bend reality to their will. That could either be bulldozing people in their life or packing up their things and leaving. And, it could be that time goes on and the situation abated. But, they meet themselves again with a new face or in a new place. Then, they wonder, how am I in this situation again?
My job is sometimes to point out the pattern. I know when I hit a nerve because most people dance around it either by defensiveness, dismissiveness or minimization. I often ask them if we look at this closely, what do you think we'll find here? Often, they fear a bad outcome. And, that's fair. That fear is real and visceral. My job, then, at this point, is to hold their hand (if they let me) so they can feel safe exploring the unknown.
But some aren't even curious enough, despite all the assurances. But the world moves on and no decision is a decision because of it. Some have accepted their lot in life and I see their world get smaller as a result.
I feel sad and baffled by the inertia because, the fact is, the world is big and the possibilities are endless. I'm not expressing that as a mere platitude. There are billions of people on earth and each person experiences the world differently. You're telling me that your solution doesn't lie in any one of these people? That the reality you want is not already being lived?